Dreaming of Mr. Rex

Sometimes, this insomniac catches a lucky break, and actually falls asleep.  Then I enter dream world, and if I'm lucky, I get to visit for a while.  But most of the time, I only visit for a brief time, and then wake up with my head full of the dream I just had...and BOOM! My brain is off and running with the dream, and I lie awake the rest of the night thinking about said dream...

So, here's last nights play-by-play...

I had a dream that I lived in this Mayan-ey ruin type building, that had this wicked looking slide down the front of it, that was all white marble, and cut into the marble were these white face masks.  The slide ended at the edge of a canyon that was at least a couple of miles wide, and on the other side of this canyon there were these pretty fields that had all this gorgeous green grass, and pretty trees that held fruit...it was just pretty.  But I couldn't get to all that prettiness, because in the canyon, there was this big ol' T-Rex that guarded the fields and trees....

(Evidently I have a thing with T-Rex's.) Anyhoo, the whole purpose of the slide was to feed the T-Rex, so he wouldn't climb out of the canyon and eat me.  So, every once in a while, I'd slide these big slabs of meat down the slide, and Mr. Rex would come lumbering out, nom-nom away, and then disappear again.  For a little while, we were both content with this arrangement...and then one day, I decided I wanted to go to the pretty place.  So, in true dreamlike fashion, I just threw some glitter in the air, and flew right on over the canyon, and landed on all that green grass.  I was walking, barefoot, through the pretty place, picking which tree I wanted to sit under and read(because even in my dream, I carry a book with me), when out of no where the ground starts shaking, and here comes Mr. Rex, shattering my time of peace.  So, I flee back to my Mayan ruin, and get mad.

Now I'm all angry, and I decide no stupid monster is going to keep me from my happy place.  So, I devise a plan to lure the T-Rex into my domain, and trap him in the Mayan ruin.  I lay out a bunch of meat, at the top of the slide.  Mr. Rex smells it, and comes looking for it...it was actually quite funny, because here's this big dinosaur, with these itty bitty arms, climbing this wall out of the canyon, and then trying to make his way up the slippery slide...even in my dream I laughed at the poor guy! So, he gets to the top of the ruin, and starts eating the meat, and I sneak behind him and slide down that long, white, marble slide and float right over the canyon, and end up in the happy place.

Mr. Rex doesn't fare so well....after pigging out, he's slow and clumsy.  He goes down the slide as well, backwards, and falls right down into that deep canyon.  My monster buddy is vanquished, and I wander happily through the pretty place.  The end...

Yeah, if only...I stay up the rest of the night, thinking about the dream, and trying to figure out what it means.  I've got a pretty good idea too...

Me-to-the-Ow

Last night was a rough one.  You couldn't have paid my brain to sleep.  So, I'm just chilling, watching the hours tick by, and I hear a little sound.  It's not loud, and it doesn't happen again for a while, so I forget it.  And then I hear it again...it's this really quiet rustling sound...and then it's gone.  This goes on for a while, and I'm seriously beginning to think that I'm finally losing it, when I realize where the sound is coming from.  So, I get up, turn on my light, and peer into a large box on my desk(why is there a large box on my desk? It's a long story, and I'm so not getting into it right now!).  And staring back at me are these huge yellow eyes, and that's about it! I start laughing, because I realize that my sisters cat, Max, has basically turned this box into his secret hide out, and then I turn off the lights, crawl back into bed, and try to sleep. 

But, of course, now my brain has something new to play with, so BOOM! We're off and running.  I start to realize that Max looked super content and safe in his little fort, and I decide I want a fort too.  So it's on...but of course, I can't just imagine what it would be like to have my own grown up fort, no! My brain decides that I need to contemplate what it would be like if I were also a cat, and had my own box fort. Seriously...what is wrong with me?? I mean, can you say crazy cat lady??  It's just not right! So, here's what I came up with...

• I'd want to be a black or grey kitty(so I could disappear in the shadows), with big ol' yellow or vivid green eyes
• I'd want my fort to be small, and snug, so other cats couldn't get in it with me
• I'd want to be able to see what the humans were doing, so I could plot against them, like you know all cats do
• I'd hide in the fort like Max did, and be super quiet, so at any time I could jump out and give other cats and people, for that matter, a mild heart attack
• If any other cat tried to encroach upon my territory, I'd whap them in the face with my paw!
• I'd make sure I had a secret pawshake all figured out, for when I wasn't in my fort, and I needed to call in backups to protect my territory
• There would most definitely be a theme song involved
• I would sleep in it every night, and hide there during thunderstorms
• I'd probably want to decorate it at some point
• I would pretend I was the Cheshire cat from "Alice in Wonderland" and only make my eyes visible, because I know that would freak people out

And that, my friends, is what keeps me up at nightt...

May The Odds Be Ever In Your Favor....

Ok, this one is just plain crazy.  Before I can tell you what I was pondering, I have to give you a little background.  I've got cats(enter crazy cat lady comment here).  And those cats figure in to this brain game my mind was playing.  So, let me introduce you to the cast of characters.  First of all there's Jessi.  He's a MASSIVE black cat, that we've recently started calling Fatniss(In honor of the Hunger Games).  Then there's Cricket, also a black cat who is quite the diva.  And Max, yet another black cat, this is adorable, but quite stupid.  All of these cats live at my moms house.  Then there are these other cats that are from Matt's apartment.  First there's Buddy.  He's a regal, sweet, but kind of snooty white cat, with orange splotches.  He's really quite beautiful, and he knows it.  Then there's Winky.  He's a stripedy cat, that is an empath.  Seriously, if you feel it, he does too.  He's kind of emo actually(must be the whole "middle child syndrome" thing).  And finally, there's my little Stubby.  He's an adorable little stripedy kitty, born with only a stub for a tail-hence the name.  What he lacks in the tail area, he makes up for in speed.  For real, this cat can move!

Alrighty, now that you're up to speed, here comes the insanity.  So, as usual, I'm trying to sleep.  And Jessi is with me, trying to cuddle but really just smothering me, and I keep calling him "Fatniss".  And I ask him if he'd win the Hunger Games.  And boom! Brain latches on, shifts into overdrive, and I'm in trouble.  So, I start imagining what would happen if there was a Hunger Games for cats.  And more specifically, the six cats that I'm familiar with.  Not gonna lie...I was seriously entertained by this one.  And almost didn't care that I was going to be up all night, again.  Here's what I think would happen:

• First, in this version of the Hunger Games, no cats would be harmed, or killed.
• Jessi would most definitely be the winner-Simply because when it comes to food, he don't play around.  I mean, the boy is massive!
• That being said, Winky would be a huge contender.  He may be skinny, but that boy can eat! And he WILL get to the food.
• Buddy would probably go crazy, having to be out in the wild, with no one to tend to his needs. The cat loves to be pampered. 
• Cricket would annoy all of the other cats with her need for attention, and by the third day, all of the other cats would shun her.
• Max would totally be the snitch.  He's already a tattle-tale, and would form alliances with all of the other cats, then immediately forget said alliances-yes, he is that dumb!
• Stubby would totally be the Peeta of the group.  He'd be the one that you'd walk right up to, and not even see...not because he'd painted himself into a rock, but because he likes to hide, and he likes to run.  You'd never catch him.
• Buddy would eventually snap, turn into a hissing, slapping feral monster...that no one would take seriously, because if you've ever heard him hiss, or seen him slap, you know he's not really a threat.
• Winky would get all emo by day 2, and just want his Daddy...
• Cricket would try to endear herself to whichever cat would let her come close
• Max would forget what he was doing, and would just tra-la-la off into the sunset
• Jessi would gather all of the food at the cornucopia, and just sit there, daring anyone to challenge his victory.
• And Stubby would be hiding in the food Jessi gathered, and you'd only see him from time to time as he's zipping from one place to the other.

And that, my friends, is what keeps me up at night...

Music of the Night....

Sometimes when I can't sleep, it's because song lyrics are stuck in my head.  Last night I spent four hours going over and over the chorus of a Miranda Lambert song.  Here are the lyrics:

Fix your makeup, girl
It's just a breakup.
Run and hide your crazy
And start acting like a lady.
'Cause I raised you better,
Gotta keep it together.
Even when you fall apart...
But this aint my mama's broken heart.

I'm serious...FOUR HOURS! And now it's stuck in my head again....

T-Rex and Teddy Ruxpin...

Okay, so I have this small problem....I'm an insomniac.  I have been for a long time...and it sucks.  I don't have an aversion to sleep. I love sleep! But the thing is, my mind doesn't seem to like it as much as my body does.  Because every night, when I'm dead tired, I'll get in bed, snuggle under the covers...and lie awake pretty much all night long!

I have this little problem with my brain...it never wants to shut down.  My brain and I have had serious discussions over it's overwhelming desire to run at a frantic pace, and never shut down.  I tell it it needs rest, it laughs at me, and keeps doing what it feels like doing.  Not very considerate, if you ask me.  And the thing is, I could be a little more understanding towards my brain if it were running full speed contemplating ways to solve world issues, like poverty, hunger, the environment...etc.  But, no.  My brain isn't as lofty as it should be.  It keeps me up over the most ridiculous things! I mean, I know I'm creative, and imaginative...but even I wonder where my mind comes up with some of the things that deprive me from some much needed slumber.  So, I figure if I have to think about these thing...well, then you do too! Enjoy...

I'll start off with one that really made me wonder about myself...I mean, I agonized over this for hours! I couldn't stop thinking about it, and I lied in bed for a long time going over and over this.  Some of you have heard this one, but for those of you that haven't...well...I'll let you come to your own conclusions.

Okay, so I'm in bed.  Completely exhausted, and all I want is to slip off into dreamworld, and get some much needed rest.  Every night when I go to sleep, I try to clear my head, and not think about anything...well, my brain has a-ha, ha-mind of it's own, and decided to plague me with this craziness:

What would have happened to society(yeah, sounds important so far, doesn't it?? Keep reading...) if the inventor of the Teddy Ruxpin, and the guy that discovered the bones of the T-Rex were switched?  Would we have a massive, fierce dinosaur named Teddy Ruxpin? And a cute, snuggly teddy bear named T-Rex? And if that happened, would the dinosaur still be considered fierce? And, for that matter, would the personality of the talking teddy bear be a little more rough? Seriously, people, I couldn't make this stuff up if I tried...

For hours, and hours, this is all I could think about! And then I started seeing what might have been, in this alternate universe that my mind created.  We'd have this big ol' dinosaur, a hunter, with huge massive teeth, and we'd call him Teddy Ruxpin...not very threatening, huh? Would we think he was cute and snuggly? Would we think his short, stubby arms were adorable? Would we want to find a way to recreate this cute harmless thing, and make him our pet(only to end up being devoured...)? And what about the talking teddy bear? I mean, gone would be the sweet little best friend for you child.  All of a sudden, he'd be this rough and tough little guy, that totally wore a leather vest, leather pants, a bandanna, and dark sunglasses.  He'd probably have a little scruff on his face, and his voice would be all rough! And he'd be like "Yo, I'm T-Rex!" And all of his stories on tape would have been about him and his teddy bear biker gang.  And his friends would be as tough as him, and there'd even be a female teddy bear(his "old lady"), and her name would be Tara Dactyl.  And she'd have a smokers cough...Yep...this is what I saw. 

And I even imagined how kids would be impacted by this.  I mean it's a total game changer! Little boys that were fascinated with the dinosaur would be considered little mommas boys, and mocked.  And anyone who was all about the talking bear...well, you just better stay away from them! All night long, I let this scenario play out in my head.  I agonized over it, and tried to consider all of the angles...and I don't know why! Why did this matter so much to me? And why wouldn't my brain let it drop?

There's lots of theories out on that one...I'll keep ya posted....